What is a UUMF RENEWAL?

The Mission Statement of the UUMF (Unitarian Universalist Men’s Fellowship)

Our Mission is to support men in the quest for lives of compassion, integrity, responsibility, and balance. We are a caring, intentionally diverse brotherhood,

committed to social justice, and offering opportunities for intimate sharing,

personal growth, and spiritual deepening.

Question: Why “renewal” and not “retreat” ?

A conscious decision was made, early on, that the men were not going to ‘withdraw’ or ‘pull in’... not retreat, but rather, to refresh, regenerate....hence: RENEWAL

Question: What is the history of UUMF Renewals ?

In the mid 1980’s, Tom Owen-Towle, the minister at First Unitarian Universalist Church in San Diego, was a member of a group of men who desired a deeper, more meaningful connections with other men.

The fellowship has since facilitated more than 30 renewals, held twice each year (spring and fall). Nearly all have been theme related. The spring renewal is held at our UU camp, DeBennevile Pines, in the mountains near Riverside, and is open to all men in the Pacific Southwest District of the UU Association, however church membership or affiliation isnever a requirement. In the fall we have the renewal at a camp near Julian, Cedar Glenn, and open to all, but, generally attended by the local San Diego men. The goal of the renewals is to assist men to come to know themselves as a men, brothers, fathers and partners.

Question: What happens at a UUMF Renewal?

Interested men, about 4 or 5 months before the event, gather as a planning group to establish the theme and organize the renewal.

We divide the weekend into 5 phases.

Phase 1- Friday afternoon/evening: INTRODUCTION

Men are welcome to come up early to relax and settle in.

We usually have dinner around 6:00 o’clock. Much of the weekends are spent in small groups of 5 or 6 men which we call “Kinship Groups”. Friday evenings program is an introduction to the theme for the weekend. Following the program is a time to met and visit brothers and a songfest to bring everyone together.

Music and chanting is an integral part of our weekend experiences. It assists us in moving from the head and into a deeper place.

Phase 2- Saturday morning: THEME DEVELOPMENT

There are often hikes and meditation sessions before breakfast both Saturday & Sunday. After breakfast on Saturday, we spend time in both kinship and large circle groups, addressing the theme. This has come to be the crux of the weekend and includes members of the fellowship who speak and share of their life experiences as they relate to the topic.

Phase 3- Saturday afternoon: INDIVIDUAL ACTIVITIES

This is a time to engage in some optional individual activities. Among these OPTIONAL activities might be: games, swim, sweat lodge, hiking, workshops, music, etc. Did I say that ALL the afternoons events are strictly optional?? Many men simply take the afternoon to enjoy the surroundings, being alone and, perhaps, reading or resting.

Phase 4- Saturday evening: CELEBRATION

After dinner the evening program is a celebration of some of the internal work that each man has been engaged with over the weekend.

Phase 5- Sunday morning: REFLECTION

The Sunday morning program is a time for reflection and, if desired, sharing during our traditional “Quaker style service (“when the spirit moves you”) It is also bringing closure to the kinship groups. It is often a powerful and heartfelt conclusion to the renewal.

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There are a few “rules” that are always practiced while attending any UUMF function.

1- The right of reticence- no one is urged, encouraged or compelled to share deeper than he is comfortable.

2- Confidentiality- no one is to reveal or discuss personal information, EVER, of details shared at any of the meetings or functions.

3. Our circles are considered sacred space and we adhere to the following guidelines: